CD12 (And Some Helpful Explanations)

As I post my symptoms every day, I realize that some people read them and are probably like, HUH?

For instance, ovary pressure. I could probably ask someone what that felt like and they may give me a completely different answer than I would give. So I'm going to go through some of my symptoms and really explain them cuz someone could be experiencing the same thing but use a different term than I do.

• Ovary Pressure- When I say I have ovary pressure, what I'm feeling is a kind of pressure or discomfort where my ovary is. Especially when I pee. Usually when I have a good follicle growing, I'll get a discomfort in the ovary that has the follicle whenever I empty my bladder. It literally feels like the follicle is the size of a baseball and emptying my bladder moved it back to it's normal spot and oh can I feel it. I wouldn't say it's painful all the time, but the bigger it gets the more painful peeing can become. I also feel the pressure throughout the day depending on what I'm doing. Definitely can feel this pretty painfully the bigger the follicle gets during sex. Gets pretty uncomfortable but it's a good sign things are growing so I don't mind it. Basically to me it all feels like a mass/bubble/heaviness in my ovary. I think I explained that the best I could.
• Twinges- Twitches or spasms. Usually when I'm about to ovulate or get my period, my lower abdomen/pelvic area twitches. A few specific random spots over and over again. 
• Cervix Pain- For me it's a stabbing or shooting pain that goes through my cervix. Never experienced this pain before I had my child (who wasn't even delivered naturally) but I get it now whenever my cervix is opening (and sometimes closing).

Another thing I would like to mention is what exactly I am doing this cycle as far as fertility sign tracking. I realize I don't exactly need to do any of this since I am being monitored by ultrasound, but I like to anyway.

This cycle I am

• Temping 
• Using A Fertility Microscope 
• Using OPKs

I may start checking my cervix but it really isn't necessary since we'll be doing IUI.

If All Goes According To Plan...

We will be doing IUI in January!!!!!

Between the money we have saved up, the surprise $200 we got from Hubby's parents, and the money we will be getting for Christmas from my parents and my sister, we will have just about enough to do an IUI. Add in some extra money saved until then and we have enough. And might even have enough left over for a cheap lunch to go along with it!

So basically the plan right now is, start birth control, call for appointments, start Clomid and hope for the best.

This starts next Sunday. It will probably be the longest month of my life since we have already been 1) trying for our second one for so long and 2) we started going to our RE in July, and didn't even do our first Clomid cycle until the end of September.

Honestly, it isn't that bad though because it's only been a month and a half since we found out we had to do IUI and we already are doing it next month. I just wish Tricare would help with the cost a little bit more because we could be wasting a lot less time if they would. I'm not getting any younger here and military pay doesn't exactly support a procedure that will cost us anywhere from $450-$800(ish) out of pocket.*

So the game plan is set and we just have to wait it out now. I'm just crossing everything I have that the first time works.



*Well, they do cover it but you have to go to one of their Military Treatment Facilities (MTF) to have it covered and the nearest one to us is 7 hours away. Not exactly convenient.


For anyone interested in what happens in an IUI or doesn't know what it is, follow this link HERE to my info blog. There's also a pretty informative video to check out too.

Mother Nature, I HATE YOU.

2 days. 2 DAYS LATE. I typically have a 15 day LP and I passed it by 2 days. I didn't think I could be late without being pregnant taking Clomid and the hCG shot, but I was.

And if that wasn't bad enough, I had this taunting me.

I let my hopes get the best of me and I truly thought this could be possible. AF didn't come yesterday like it should have. Yesterday was the last possible day I could get it. And the day came and went with nothing. I woke this morning and saw my temp dive and I knew it. It was in fact not possible. But I still, for some reason, held out hope even after the negative test because I still hadn't gotten my period. Well, at noon, it came. It was like a slap in the face. Like, "See, this is what you get for getting for hopes up stupid. You know better than to do that". I feel especially stupid since I knew after failing the post coital test that this wouldn't work. Hope is evil and I hate it.

So now we are on a forced break. We can't do IUI right now because I'm not gonna screw the little one on Christmas because we want to do something that may or may not work. So basically I'll be on birth control until probably our taxes come in.

This. Sucks.

I'm sure mother nature was far too busy knocking up some teenager for MTV, or a drug addict, or someone who either doesn't want or shouldn't have a baby right now due to not having a job or income etc to have time for me. Screw you.

Mother Nature, Why Must You Torment Me So?

I did not wake up with AF as I expected to. I'm due today. My luteal phase tends to fluctuate from 14-16 days, but on average it's 15 days. I realize it's not even noon yet here but this is giving me hope. That and my temp only went down a little. Usually on the day I get my period, my temp plummets so I'm either going to get it very late tonight or tomorrow. I guess we'll just have to wait and see. If AF doesn't get here by tonight, at least my morning temp will let me know what's going on. If it's still up and I haven't gotten my period still, I'm going to be one very happy girl. But I'm not counting on it.